Vinay Menon: My compliments to Chance the Rapper and Martin Short on World Compliment Day

You look fantastic today.

You’re also smart. So I don’t have to tell you Wednesday is World Compliment Day. Actually, a quick Google search lists many observances on March 1, including Plan a Solo Vacation Day, National Welsh Corgi Day, Peanut Butter Lover’s Day, National Wedding Planning Day, Baby Sleep Day and Stop Bad Service Day.

But since it’s impossible to extract a column from National Hotel Slippers Day, let’s stick to World Compliment Day. I love that colour on you. It brings out your eyes.

A market research firm, Time2play, surveyed 1,000 Canadians on their “compliment-giving habits.” It found: “On average, 30.9 per cent of Canadians give out two to five compliments per week. On the other hand, 30.6 per cent communicate compliments daily, while 17.1 per cent hand out compliments only once a week. 13.7 per cent share compliments two to three times a month, while 6.5 per cent (are) at once a month. Only 1.2 per cent of respondents don’t give out compliments.”

Are those numbers good enough? Or can we up our praise game?

Negativity is a powerful narcotic. We spend our days doomscrolling and squabbling on social media platforms that have algorithms designed to boost engagement through anger and division. If Vlad the Impaler were alive today, he’d have 100 million Twitter followers. Mr. Rogers would be lucky to crack 10,000.

But just because social media ignores “nice,” does not mean we should. As Mark Twain quipped, “I can live for two months on a good compliment.” Research has shown that compliments lift the spirits for both givers and receivers.

Now, obviously, the key is sincerity and situational context. I compliment my friends and loved ones all the time about something — hair, pants, promotions, smiles, skills, eyes, jokes, political sanity, shrewd investments — and it’s always from the heart. By contrast, if I were to compliment Marjorie Taylor Greene or Tim Hortons, I’d be lying. If someone is accidentally electrocuted, it’s best to call 911 instead of marvelling at their spiky hairdo.

Here, I would like to compliment Chance the Rapper. He tweeted a sweet anecdote this week: “So I just got on this plane with my daughter, and found out our seats weren’t next to each other. I really ain’t wanna inconvenience anyone by asking them to swap seats, but before I could say anything this kind older gentleman offered his seat to Kensli so we could sit together. We both said thank you and as he stands up, I realize it’s THE Martin Short!! So cool and Kensli freaked out cause she’s obsessed with The Santa Clause 3. What an awesome person!”

And that is how you get a beautiful day in the neighbourhood.

Here, I would also like to compliment Marty Short, a national treasure. He volunteered to switch seats out of the goodness of his heart. Such random acts of kindness are the ultimate compliments. Chance and daughter are lucky that seat was not occupied by the creator of “Dilbert,” or that would have been a different tweet.

We already have trainers, stylists, financial advisers, therapists, career mentors, interior designers, personal shoppers — isn’t it time to add compliment coaches to the cultural rotation? In that Time2play survey, 42 per cent of Canadians said they wished to get more compliments. We need to do a better job bigging up our compatriots.

It’s all about accentuating the positive. I’ve written lots of rotten things about Justin Trudeau. But you know what? The man has outstanding socks. There. I envy his hosiery. I’ve also written lots of rotten things about Donald Trump. But you know what? The man has, ah, the man is, um … OK, Agent Orange is a disgrace to decency, democracy and honesty. He reeks of sociopathic narcissism and would sell out his kids for a free Big Mac or to cheat at golf, so let’s not go nuts on World Compliment Day.

But for everyone else? It’s time to focus on the upside.

Less than three per cent of Canadians compliment strangers. I found that telling. I met my wife in high school and not a week has gone by in which I haven’t told her she is a smokeshow or brilliant, save for her taste in life partners. It’s from the heart. But why are we reluctant to compliment strangers? And why do only 54.2 per cent of Canadians find it easy to receive a compliment? And why are only 16.5 per cent of the compliments we dole out based on the receiver’s personality?

Anyone can buy fancy brogues. Not everyone can have a good heart like Mr. Short.

And so on World Compliment Day, I’d like to give a shout-out, to use Chance’s term, to Star readers. This is not pandering. It’s from the heart. I’d like to compliment you on your exquisite taste in metropolitan newspapering. I’d like to compliment you on your enduring love of this city and country. Thank you for subscribing to this paper and supporting our charitable causes when I bug you twice a year. Thank you for reading and commenting and emailing, agree or disagree, good or bad. You must be complimented for making all of us here so much better.

I will gladly switch airplane seats with any of you.

You look fantastic today.

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